Many couples’ sexual relationships have been truncated by the threats facing their sexual life, these threats have made a lot of couples’ bedroom boring! Boredom in the bedroom separates couples sexually, emotionally and physically. We will discuss a few common challenges that can make your bedroom “blah”. If you want to keep the romantic fire burning in your bedroom, then you know these challenges and overcome them.
THE PERIL OF A WOMAN’S SEXUAL LIFE
Most women will experience some problems with their sex life at some point in their lifetime. Luckily, various healthcare professionals, including sex therapists and counsellors, are trained to help people with these issues. The top two sexual concerns for women are low desire or complete lack of sexual desire and being pre-orgasmic (anorgasmia). Up to 40% of women report having little or no sexual appetite, even if they are in otherwise satisfying relationships. This sexual dysfunction gets worst as we age. The second concern pertains to women who haven’t yet experienced an orgasm.
Lack of Sexual Desire (I’m not in the mood, not today!)
Low sexual desire means lack or low energy in the bedroom that can be so frustrating! The list of possible causes of low sexual desire is quite long. Factors that may lead to lack of sexual desire include but are not limited to:
Ageing and Hormonal Changes
Changes associated with menopause may conspire to reduce a woman’s interest in sex. Hot flashes, night sweats, and weight gain can all impact a woman’s feelings of desire and desirability. All these lead to an unhealthy sex life, with unhealthy sex life comes loneliness and depression. Post-menopause women suffer greatly from this.
Conflict with one’s partner over everyday issues, from money concerns to child rearing, can reduce feelings of desire. Conflicts are the number one killer of sex drive and healthy relationships. Please don’t allow a little disagreement to truncate your sex life!
Unskilled Sexual Partners
People who are experiencing unsatisfying sex may lose sexual desire.
The more the unsatisfactory sex you’ve had, the less sex you want (conversely, the more good sex you have, the more you want). Proper communication will help in this situation. Couples who communicate with each other and discuss their dissatisfactions tend to bridge the discrepancy in their relationship.
Certain medical conditions may affect sexual desire. One of the symptoms of depression, for example, is a lack of interest in sex. With these, you need to see a doctor for help! Remember, health is wealth!
What You Can Do
First, you should work with your physician to rule out any medical reasons for low desire. Next, it is necessary to understand how your body responds to touch. Make time for self-pleasuring (masturbation) and explore your capacity to experience pleasure. Additionally, seek educational resources that will help you communicate your sexual needs to your partner.
Explore the causal factors that allow you to have an orgasm alone but not with a partner. For example, does your clitoris get a type of stimulation that is different in each situation? You need to know your own body for you to enjoy sex. Let your partner know what kind of sexual stimulation you like. Remember, communication is the key!